Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
DR. PHIL : The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.
OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.
GEORGE W. BUSH : We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...
DR SEUSS : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.
ERNEST HEMINGWAY : To die in the rain. Alone.
GRANDPA : In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.
JOHN LENNON : Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your chick book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ........ reboot.
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

Jamie overworked???

Jamie has been working for the local newsagents since December as the paper boy on the train station at Springwood. He now does three mornings a week, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday from 5:45am till about 7:15am then he catches the bus to school.
David, the newsagent, says he only takes kids on that he's seen grow up and he knows the family (but Jamie got the job despite all that!). Once Jamie has done a while on the station he'll 'graduate' to working in the shop.
David tells us that Jamie is doing well, is starting to relax and is even laughing at David's jokes (time to pull him out I say). David said he was once commended by a customer for being kind enough to employ "those retarded boys on the train station." We had lots of fun at Jamie's expense with that one.
Then late the week before last Jamie got a phone call from Franklins, one of the local supermarkets, asking him to phone and arrange an interview. He promptly did so and had his interview, lasting all of about 5 minutes I think, on Wednesday. They told him he had the job on Thursday and he starts tomorrow. The Franklins work will be after school work so it won't clash with the newsagents until he graduates to the shop and then he can decide what he wants to do.

First Aiders

Robbie and I have spent this weekend at a Senior's First Aid course at Rural Fire Service Headquarters in Katoomba. The course was conducted by Luke, a man who is an RFS volunteer, an RFS paid employee and a St John Ambulance member (not sure whether that's a paid position or not). He's still in training as an instructor so yesterday he was being supervised by a real welsh Welshman, David Jones.
Thankfully David wasn't there today, he was doing a session at Dan's VF training at which Karen was assisting. I told her to say hello from me. David was a bit melodramatic and always said something three times when once would have done.
Luke was a complete contrast, quiet and unassuming but with a wicked sense of humour and one of the best instructors of any kind I'd come across.
We had our lectures over the two days. Yesterday we were taught and later assessed on our CPR (mouth to mouth and cardiac massage) technique. We all passed well. Today there were more topics to cover then we had a multiple choice exam. Robbie and I both got 20/20. Then we were assessed in how we coped witha number of scenarios with everyone in groups of 4 and taking a turn at being the First Aider, the victim, or innocent bystanders. Again Rob and I were passed competent and we are now certified for the next 3 Years.

Ishbel elected to SRC

Ishbel came back from school very excited on Friday. She has been voted, by her classmates, to be one of two Student Representative Council members.

Perhaps she will be the first one in our family to be a Member of Parliament?

Here she is in the Speaker's Chair at Old Parliament House, Canberra.

The People of the Book by Geraldine Brooks

In the People of the Book, Geraldine Brooks tells the possible story behind the "Sarajevo Haggadah" http://www.haggadah.ba/?x=1, a an illuminated manuscript containing the traditional text of the Passover Haggadah. It is the oldest Sephardic Haggadah in the world, originating in Spain around 1350. It is now owned by the National Museum of Bosnia and Herzegovina in Sarajevo. Pages from the Sarajevo Haggedah can be seen at: http://www.talmud.de/sarajevo/einstieg.htm

The people of the book include Dr. Hanna Heath, an Australian conservator who goes to Sarajevo in 1996 to assist the UN to restore the book for the museum. In the course of her work on the book she finds the wing of a month, a hair, wine stains, salt crystals. Each item becomes part of the story of the people from the book's past: Lola, Sarajevo, 1944; Dr Hirschfeldt, Vienna, 1894; Rabbi Judah Aryeh and Father Giovanni Vestorini, Venice, 1609; Ruth Ben Shousahn, Tarragona, 1492; Zahra bint Ibrahim al-Tarek, Seville, 1480. As we go back in history the full story of the book is unveiled.

The book is symbolic of the racial harmony that used to exist, firstly in mediaeval Spain where the book was created during the Convivencia and later in Bosnia where, before the Nazi invasion, Jews, Muslims and Christians lived and worshipped side by side.

An historic day - The Sorry speech

It was an important day today with the new PM, Kevin Rudd, finally saying Sorry for wrongs that have been perpetrated on the Aboriginal people of Australia by successive governments over the last 100 years, particularly to the "Stolen Generations"; Aboriginal children who were taken away from their families, often suddenly and violently, and taken to be brought up in non-indigenous settings.

The speech in Parliament began shortly after I got to work this morning (9am) and a few of us went across the road to the neighbourhood centre to watch it on their TV. It was very moving. Here is a video of it : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1jeWeDpc68 and this is where you can read it in its entirety :
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2008/02/12/1202760291188.html

I was asked if I had dressed in the Aboriginal colours (red, black and yellow) to honour the day. I had a red tank top over black trousers and shirt. I replied, no and that I wasn't wearing the whole get up - the yellow was missing. Later, however, I found that I was wearing yellow - my undies - but Gillian made me promise not to wear them outside my trousers so I could only assure the others that I was, accidentally, in full Aboriginal garb today. (The outfit was roundly criticised by Ishbel this morning who told me in no uncertain terms that the red and black "didn't work."

Ooops!

Here is the real Test Tube Alien.

Rory's Test Tube Alien

We got a Test Tube Alien for Rory's Christmas and were pleased to hear he has been looking after it carefully and it has grown well. He even sent us a photo of the alien (see picture on left).

The girl's like spaghetti : why, you can't manage without apostrophes! by Lynne Truss & illustrated by Bonnie Timmons

You know how there's always some little nugget of grammar that eludes you? Well for me, it was the proper use of apostrophes. I can do the apostrophes that denote missed letters as in "It's a nice day," but apostrophes used to denote ownership gave me the heeby jeebies. I am vaguely aware that putting the apostrophe in one place meant the thing had one owner and putting it in another spot could denote a thing had several owners but was never clear on which was which.

Well last night, now in the middle of my 40s, I read this gorgeous little book and it's all crystal clear.

Grammar perfectionist Lynne Truss demonstrates the correct use of apostrophes. Clearly, and aided by the lovely humourous illustrations by Bonnie Timmons, she shows how much difference the placement of an apostrophe can make to the meaning of a sentence, eg. "We're here to help you" compared with "Were here to help you".

Also by this author for children : Eat, shoots and leaves : Why, commas really do make a difference. And for adults, Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation and Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of the World Today, or Six Good Reasons to Stay Home and Bolt the Door.

Look down the side for slide shows

I was going to go to bed early tonight but I've been fiddling with our photo collections and if you scroll down the side of the blog you'll see I've added some slide shows.
I'm in the middle of labelling Jamie's Japan trip photos, but it's hard to get him to help when he's doing something else. When we've done I'll add them as a slide show too.

Busy weekend

Another busy weekend half way through.
Today, apart from the usual housework and grocery shopping, we have signed up the kids for their winter sport. Despite her less than enthusiastic end to last season, Ishbel has decided she wants to play soccer again this year so she was signed up to that today. Robbie wants to play Rugby Union this year. That coincides with Ben's wish for this year so Ian and Karen took the boys down to register for that this morning. Jamie says he wants to do a martial art. I think there's a guy does something in the hall at Faulconbridge so I'll have to be proactive in making sure Jamie gets along to that.
Tomorrow RFS training is on so I at least will go to that. Rob has made arrangements to go to see Sweeney Todd (Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter) with some mates. I'll see if I can get Jamie up early.
For lunch we are going to Kim and Graham's. Their eldest son, Alex, was killed this time last year in a motorcycle accident and the lunch is a little family/friends get together and memorial for him.
At 5:45pm I've arranged to go and see Death at a Funeral with some girlfriends. Karen, Dan and Ben saw it and said it was hilarious. Could be the antidote to a potentially glum afternoon that I need.
Next week promises to be busy too. With the schools back, the Scouts also start so Ian will be out running the Joeys on Monday. Ishbel is going to be moving up to the Cubs sometime soon with her little friend Joanna but I think they go to Joeys still/also for a little while doing a 'link' or some such.
Tuesday night is RFS meeting night for me.
On Wednesday Ian is off to Adelaide for a couple of nights to train staff in new software that was installed over the Christmas break. He was devastated to learn that there was nothing in the way of budget hotels left and he's had to book in to an expensive one!
Thursday night I should be going to belly dancing but, unless I can persuade Ishbel to come with me, I won't be able to go this week. I'm not making much headway in the persuasion department so far even though there was another 7 year old girl there this Thursday past. I had been thinking about going for a while then Jenny at work said she and some others had been talking about it while I was on leave and so 4 of us from work rolled up. When we got there, apart from the ladies I knew from before, there was Francoise from RFS and Diana who is one of Cathy's friends.
My work promises to be frantic. The library is undergoing ISO (international standards) accreditation this year, starting on 18th February with the first, gap analysis, audit. I am in charge of the procedure manual (have I said this all before, I think so). To cut a long ramble short, it'll be a lot of work, not made easier by our supervisor, who has been on 6 weeks leave over the school holidays already, ringing to request another month off. She is also the only staff member in the library with ISO training. Vicki didn't think it would be a good idea to force her to come back if she wanted to be elsewhere so granted Robyn the extra time.
On Monday I also have to go in and fight with the enveloping machine again. Friday was a beggar of a day all up with all the technologies fighting me - I was fiddling with the library catalogue settings and had to do the same thing several times before it would work, the enveloper kept saying the envelope tray was empty when it clearly wasn't and kept jamming and messing up my mailout, I set the printer to double side print my mailout letters and must've taken a page out too early and ended up with the address to services on one side but the details of another service on the other and had to start all over again. When I tried to shred the stuffed up mailout pages, the shredder wouldn't work, with the bin full light on when the bin wasn't on. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAArgh!