Mo gotta go

Sorry, should have posted this a couple of days ago. Been busy.

Monday was the last day of the Mo. The picture shows how big and bushy it got (even without dangly bits) but it was with great relief all round that it was removed without ceremony on Monday night.

It's not too late to donate on Ian's Mospace page - he's raised $730. It would be great if we could tip it over the $1000 mark.

On the Mo theme, here's a story from Newsbiscuit :

Selleck’s moustache killed in gun battle
Tom Selleck’s Magnum PI moustache, which starred with him in the hit 1980s TV series ‘Magnum PI’ died today in a gun battle with a Los Angeles SWAT team outside an LA drinks store.
The moustache never recovered after work dried up and was devastated when Selleck degided to go without a moustache for a few years, only to return with a younger, bushier model. Eventually, it sank into playing the moustache of deliverymen and repairmen in porn movies.

Witnesses say that the moustache was hysterical, shouting that when he and the guy who used to play Higgins used to go ‘tomcatting’ around Hawaii, and could get ‘any tail they wanted’. The moustache is survived by some bumfluff.

Jason O’Mahony

Ishbel's poem

Ishbel wrote this poem at school.

I don't want an outside cat!

I don't want an outside cat
A nitty gritty slabby tabby cat

I don't want an outside cat
A cat that hides in the bushes

I don't want an outside cat
A fighting with other outside cat

I don't want an outside cat
A crying at the door for breakfast cat

I don't want an outside cat
A hiding under cars when it rains cat

I want an inside cat
A furry purry Bermilla inside cat.

She may have a point - Abigail and I are waiting to go up to the vet this morning. Jamie and I took her up on Saturday morning with a nasty, suppurating wound on her cheek which she has got in a fight with another cat/possum. She was given an antibiotic injection and a painkilling injection and this morning the vet will decide whether she needs an operation to open the wound to be drained.

TGIF - What's up Mac?

For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this:

COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO : Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT : Mac?

COSTELLO : No, the name's Lou

ABBOTT : Your computer?

COSTELLO : I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT : Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT : What about Windows?

COSTELLO : Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT : Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO : I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT : Wallpaper.

COSTELLO : Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT : Software for Windows?

COSTELLO : No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT : Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT : I just did.

COSTELLO : You just did what?

ABBOTT : Recommend something.

COSTELLO : You recommended something ?

ABBOTT : Yes.

COSTELLO : For my office?

ABBOTT : Yes.

COSTELLO : OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT : Office.

COSTELLO : Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT : I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO : I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT : Word.

COSTELLO : What word?

ABBOTT : Word in Office.

COSTELLO : The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT : The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO : Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT : The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

COSTELLO : I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO : That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT : Money.

COSTELLO : I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT : It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO : What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT : Money.

COSTELLO : Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT : Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO : I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT : One copy.

COSTELLO : Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT : Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO : They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT : Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT : Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO : How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT : Click on 'START'. . .

Hot weekend

It was hotter than hades all weekend, a Total Fire Ban was declared and then yesterday we woke up to a freezing 16C! If we all get the 'flu I won't be at all surprised.

It was a peaceful weekend with the boys off at a Venturer thing called Waratah that they go to each year. Just popped over to Facebook to see what they got up to but I don't think they've written about it.

I saw Robbie for the first time in what seemed like ages this morning (Tuesday) because the boys left for Waratah before I came home from work on Friday afternoon, I was at the station on standby until after 6:30pm on Sunday, the day they came back - I think I may have seen Robbie fleetingly before he went off to bed after his heavy weekend - he told me they made a raft out of an old table - I was up early yesterday morning before Rob got up to attend a conference in the City, he was at work by the time I got home and by the time he got home after 11pm I was tucked up in bed, snoring! I had trouble recognising him when he popped his nose round the bathroom door!!!!

Ian drove up to the Waratah with the boys because they needed someone to pull a trailer. He was unsure whether he would drive home again afterwards, I didn't want him to because it would be very late. Anyhow, Ishbel and I were the only ones home and readied ourselves for a girls night in. We rang and invited Karen so she and Xavier (promoted to girl for the evening) came over for a few hours.

Xavier is walking really well, albeit with that holding his arms up and out, loose-kneed, orangutan looking way. He'd just been doing a step or two when we saw him not long ago. It was a bit disconcerting when he bolted off along the length of the kitchen!

On Saturday evening we had some of the RFS crowd round for a BBQ. We had to arrange ourselves round social butterflies Nigel and Amanda who we hadn't seen for many months. Nigel is now working in real estate, working Saturday and Sunday and unable to come to training. We hadn't got together with the others for a while either so it was nice to hang out again.

On Sunday I'd put myself down for Standby at the station. I went armed with a board game, Carcasonne, and a book. The first thing we did was get loaded up in the truck and drive into Springwood for coffees! Just as we got back in the truck we watched a man scrape the car in front of him as he reversed into a car parking space. He then started to drive forward again to leave. Quick as a flash Steve was out the truck and over the road to tell him that if he didn't report it, we would. He tried to deny touching the car. "There's six firefighters in that truck would testify otherwise," said Steve. How did he think he could get away with it?

Back at the shed, I swept out the tanker bay - a complete waste of time because the wind blew all the dust and leaves back in again and by the time we left, it looked as it did before I started! In between weather reports from Narrow Neck nr Katoomba and Glenbrook, we played games, Carcassonne as mentioned before and Scrabble on Pete's iphone. At one point, according to our calculations, the RFS FDI or Fire Danger Index hit the new rating "Catastrophic"! I bought a couple of boxes on Friday and wrote out a list for our Bushfire Relocation Kits.

About 2am on Monday morning the cool change came through (I know because I was awake) and by morning it was even quite chilly. I had to be at the train station to catch the 6:40am train to the City to attend the Public Libraries NSW Conference which is being held in the Masonic Lodge on Goulburn Street - we had the speeches in the hall complete with big thrones, etc. Most of the speeches were interesting but the last session was deadly and it was all I could do to stay awake.

We wake up to the 6am news each morning. In this morning's news was a story about a ram raid on a fashion shop in which Prada bags among other goodies were stolen. I wonder if our management team, Vicki, Patou and Leisa, were involved - they were staying down there for a couple of nights!!

It's a scorcher!

It's very warm here today. I've just been down to the bank during my lunch break. When we first go out of the building, we're still nice and cool for a few minutes but the heat is quite oppressive and despite dandering along at what Gillian calls "Melanesian pace", I was soon hot and bothered.

I met Klaus in town. His brother Michael is back again (he comes for several months every 2-3 years). He left Germany yesterday with 8C and arrived this morning to this! Reminds me of my first trip to Australia - I left Edinburgh the first day we had snow and 30 odd hours later arrived to 40C in Albury-Wodonga!

A thunderstorm is now rumbling about and there was lightning when I was out. Gillian was curious as to the temperature and look what she found :

It was forecast to be a warm one but I don't think a top of 44.4C was cited.

Travel Advice for Australia

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins).

Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die. __________________________________________________
Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________
Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia ? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )
A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not . . . Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________
Q: Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do. . .
__________________________________________________
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is . . . Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________
Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )
A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________
Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
__________________________________________________
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia , but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
__________________________________________________
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

Mo on the grow

Here he is a little over two weeks on. This is a vast improvement with the two little dangly bits shaved off - he was going for the bandido look over the weekend but it was frowned on and it's gone.

Not our brigade but it'll give you a taste for the RFS

Good old South Katoomba - ? now renamed - some of them are even nice people!

Celebrating 40 Years of Sesame Street

Bit late with this, Sesame Street was celebrating its 40th Birthday last week.




Hooray for Cookie Monster!

I think that this would have to be my favourite Sesame Street thing though :



It was a big hit when we lived in Iserlohn.

TGIF - Nunsense

Three nuns were at a rugby final.

Three men were sitting directly behind them.

Because their head-dresses were particularly blocking the view, the men began to badger the nuns, hoping that they'd get annoyed enough to move to another area.

In a very loud voice the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Sydney; there are only 100 nuns living there."

Then the second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Tasmania; there are only 50 nuns living there."

The third guy said, "I want to go to New Zealand; there are only 25 nuns living there."

One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men and in a very sweet and calm voice said,

"WHY DON'T YOU GO TO HELL .. THERE AREN'T ANY NUNS THERE!"